Cherub on the Left: “What the hell is she doing?” Cherub on the Right: “By the looks of it, orgasming.” Left: “From just a spritz? We should all be so lucky. I wonder what’s in the bottle?” Right: “Whatever it is, I’m sure it doesn’t smell like her […]
In the opening scenes, Lady Gaga is dripping wet, climbing out of somebody’s swimming pool. She is wearing odd headgear, some contraption that you can’t get at your local mall, and the assumption is that she was thrown out of a passing alien spaceship because she’s wearing too […]
In yet another example of Tea Party members completely misunderstanding America and what it stands for, the political cult has chosen to release its latest mindless rant about nothing. A “fact-finding” committee, led by one Willard M. Bushney, leader of the scandal-plagued church, Our Lady of Endless Inbreeding, […]
Professor Eugene Oregonus is a member of the tenured faculty at The University for People Who Can Actually Afford to Go Here. As such, with that “tenured” angle, just like Supreme Court justices who are worthless but somehow got the promotion, he can say whatever he wants without […]
We start out with Madonna and a gang of friends all gathered round one of those areas where folks used to do spontaneous break-dancing back in the day, mainly because the Internet really hadn’t caught on just yet and people were bored. There’s a small child doing a […]
Editor’s Note: Nicole has a talent for capturing mundane situations that suddenly veer into the absurd, such as this humorous piece where a simple transition from car to house becomes an unexpected adventure. Enjoy… low-key no key: breaking and entering is deceptively difficult You always hope that the […]
Jimmy: “I’m sorry, what did you just ask?” Maggie: “Where is your Husband Department?” Jimmy: “Are you trying to find the Men’s clothing section?” Maggie: “No, Husband. I need a new one.” Jimmy: “May I inquire as to what’s wrong with the old one?” Maggie: “He’s just not […]
Note: In honor of Spirit Day, an anti-bullying campaign in support of LGBT youth, I dug out this piece that I scribbled back in 2009. The editor in me really wanted to clean this story up, as I usually do when I re-post something dusty, but in the […]
Thelma and Bleu Cheese An unhappily-married woman gets fed up with, well, everything, so she hops in a car and decides to just drive places and see what happens. All of her girlfriends have mani-pedi appointments that they don’t dare break, so Thelma is forced to take along […]
Nadine: “Why are you handing this to me?” Postman Pete: “It’s addressed ‘To the Lady of the House’.” Nadine: “You’re assuming that this is my house. And that I’m a lady.” Pete: “You did sort of walk out the door just now.” Nadine: “That doesn’t prove anything. I […]
Bonnywood Manor 
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