Joan: “What do you mean you won’t allow me to check in to this hotel?”
Desk Clerk: “We have a strict policy against letting people into the building with eyebrows that are bigger than the Chrysler Building. It’s a structural issue, and we can’t jeopardize the safety of the other guests. I’m sure you understand.”
Joan: “No, I don’t understand. This is discrimination. I was born this way!”
Desk Clerk: “No you weren’t. You would never have made it out of the womb with those speed bumps. Come back and see us when your gardener has had a chance to hack at those things with a weed-whacker.”
Categories: Past Imperfect
Bonnywood Manor 
Made me laugh!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad you like it, Lindy!
LikeLike
🙂 – How the styles change over the years, and years and years. I’m no fan of the “thin is in” eyebrow brigade, but they are really thick brows.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Confession Time: I have probably the thickest eyebrows you have ever seen on this planet. (I actually have to have them trimmed when I get my haircut every 4 weeks, with innocent bystanders running and screaming as the industrial-strength trimmer sends deadly bits of shrapnel flying through the air.) So I don’t really have any room to talk, but still, Joan Crawford’s eyebrows are legendary, and I just had to go there… 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
and you did, so well 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cara DeLevigne wouldn’t make it past security, for sure. Great post, as usual.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Confession: I had no idea who this person is (wobbling around in my Fortress of Solitude as I do) so I had to do a bit of googling. Yes, Cara could definitely cause a few alarm sensors to go off… 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
She’s cute and so are you. Loved this entry. xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Funny, funny, funny.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Margo! The expression on Joan’s face is what got my mind to clicking…
LikeLike
Ouch! I share Crawford’s pain…and Groucho Marx’s for that matter.
But if anyone questions me about my brows, I’ll tell them with pride, “I grew them myself. And they’re 100% real.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
I share the pain as well, with the double wide action on my forehead. But on the flip side, those bushy things have come in quite handy when I’m not paying attention and run into a wall, cushioning the impact like little bumpers… 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Joan Crawford: Proof that transitioning from male to female is harder than it looks.
LikeLiked by 1 person
But at least her dress is very sensible… hold up, I never noticed that woman (man?) in the chair behind her. Hmm. That completely changes the story and I’ll have to do a re-write…
LikeLike
Crawford scared the living hell out of me long before I ever saw “Mommy, Dearest,” which scared the hell back in. I know she’s a major float in the gay pride parade but I never understood why. Is it because there’s so little to do for a dude to look like her? I mean, a thick layer of lipstick and a few false eyelashes and you’re there, Rupert. Nothin’ left but the beatings.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think the attraction is two-fold for us Rainbow Folk: The first, of course, is her ability to survive in Hollywood, despite that androgynous look that she pursued, and the juicy/bitchy roles she chewed on. The second is “Mommy, Dearest”. That movie was so over-the-top camp that it was etched in our memories forever. (To be fair, much of that campiness came from Faye Dunaway, so Joan shouldn’t really get that much credit, but it still added to the addled legend.) Personally, Joan Crawford is not one of my faves even though I respect what she was able to accomplish.I just don’t envision us ever meeting for cocktails…
LikeLike
Thank you for the considered response. I’ve heard long gay speeches from some of my drag queen friends, complete with pearl-clutching, about her fierceness. I get it. I’m just not into monitor lizards.
No, really, she reminds me too much of my own abusive family. Being at the mercy of a narcissist is NOT a Hollywood fairytale, I’m afraid. Anyway, Howard looked better as Marylin Monroe, anyway. He had the legs for it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, I completely understand being at the mercy of a narcissist, trust. (I’ll write that book some day, mmm hmm.) And by most accounts, Joan was a terrible person, especially to her children, so in some respects the drag queen respect is hollow. Here’s my minimalist and inconsequential take on the matter: https://crustypie.wordpress.com/2015/04/08/past-imperfect-134/
P.S. How are you able to insert videos into your comments? Am I completely inept, or are you doing some kind of magical Harry Potter business?
LikeLike
Harry Potter WISHES he could do my shit. Let’s see him pretend to be perky three days before his period and we’ll see what’s what.
Or you can just right click the address of the You Tube video up in the search bar and paste it in between two blank lines in the comments section.
LikeLiked by 1 person