Reflections

Of Birds Having Flown

Larua and Mark 2

Note: I normally don’t re-post a previous entry on the same blog, but for some reason it just felt like time to dust this one off again…

  This is a poem I wrote for a special friend who had just lost her brother. These are my reactive thoughts to a specific relationship, but I think, I hope, that the words can provide at least a tiny bit of solace to all siblings who awake one day to find that things have changed…

 

Of Birds Having Flown

 

Younger then, we were

And the newness, the innocence, still shiny gifts

Sparkling in their wrapping, the folded edges sharp and clean

 

Each morning was another chance, more promise

With relish, we threw back the blankets

What would make us smile today?

 

The delicious possibilities, when age is single digits

And a sibling, a compadre, to share it with

Ah, mighty fine, indeed

 

Today, we will be warriors in the backyard, avenging the misdeeds done our tribe

Tomorrow, we build a fort out of sofa cushions, to protect a pale, lovelorn princess

And the next tomorrow, a spaceship, with tinfoil and cardboard

 

The tomorrows are plenty when first you walk, first you dream

Your brother at your side as you slay the vengeful dragon

Your sister at your ear, urging you to climb higher in the tree

 

And we grow with our tomorrows, as we should

New things beckon, other paths open

There are more than just princesses who yearn

 

Did you see that horse, with the muscles that flow, and the power?

This book I’ve been reading, I cherish it so

The stars, so many stars, where do I begin, how do I begin to understand?

 

And sometimes, and oftentimes, the paths we shared slowly branch

Options present themselves, small choices that veer slightly, almost imperceptibly

But the beacons we seek do vary, and the songs we hear have different tunes

 

So the single digits become double, and paths and songs are followed

Sometimes, it’s only a slight change in pitch

Other times, it’s an entirely different symphony

 

But that’s what makes us human, humane

The beck and call, and how we respond

Each of us hears unique whispers, quiet signals in the night

 

And because we love, we christen the voyages we do not understand, with our blessing,

With our hope, and we cross our fingers, letting the ship be sailed

For if not for a snowflake that drifted another way, we could be at that same helm

 

And at some point we watch from afar, still with the hope

As the ones we love plant marigolds in gardens distant and unfamiliar

Personal seeds, watered with uniqueness, distinct thumbs of green, unknown but known

 

Years, they tick, faster and faster, from eons to seconds

And things are left unsaid, actions not taken, because we don’t fully grasp time

Until the hourglass is abruptly dry, broken

 

Sudden un-rightness, the theft of a life, the void that follows

And the questions that tumble into our brain

Was I there at the right time? Did I say the right thing? Did they know?

 

That I loved them.

That I wanted everything for them.

Despite their annoying ability to be cuter than me at critical family gatherings

 

Of course they knew

Of course they felt your distant hand in the deep of the night

When dreams and life dance, a waltz of what was and could be

 

After all, you once saved a pale princess, with her tinfoil crown

And she thanked you for being so brave and so strong

Mighty warriors, determined and true

 

And the years roll back and the now and suddenness melts

And there is only the tree of long ago and ever more, with skinned knees and sap on your fingers

Reaching down to hoist your brother even higher

 

You part the branches of your castle tower and point

Can you see the horses running? Just over there?

It’s your turn to ride with them, fly with them, feel with them

 

And off they go, the horses, and the thundering hoofs of distant and near

Over the crest of with me and into the valley of without

Where the sun always shines with rays of answers that we all seek

 

Save a place for me, intrepid warrior, you who went where I did not,

A seat by that burning campfire, where is and was and what could be touch hands

And the stars remember all of the bits that we’ve misplaced…

 

(Photo graciously provided by the Hopeman Family Archives. Originally posted on 06/21/14.)

 

18 replies »

    • Hi, Lorie. That’s a beautiful image, a promise to keep. For some reason, transition times lead me to thoughts of nature and natural beauty, far away from skyscrapers and phone lines and people who are so busy and… all that noise. My fondest memories often center around a well-tended fire, people talking in small groups or large, laughing, watching the flames, the inner pondering, the outer happiness, the peace…

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I cried too- well more like a small leak. Leaking ,as opposed to crying , signifies that something has touched my soul and my soul lets me know by sending small droplets of water to silently roll down my cheeks.Leaking is a willingness to connect with another,s pain or joy or confusion. Another’s life. Crying is mostly about my own pain, joy or confusion. Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • What a thoughtful differentiation between leaking and crying, especially the bit about “willingness to connect”, which many people seem to lack in our “modern age” of constant distractions. I’m glad you leaked, in the good way, and your considerate commentary (as well as those of others above) is helping push me to out that folder of other “deeper” things that I normally don’t share. This may or may not be a good thing. We’ll see!

      Like

  2. Brian this is achingly beautiful. Dare I say the construction I is divine. The movement picking up pace as life progresses and the feeling of no control (we have none) over the process and the wistful moments of wondering if we said the right things, if they knew. That we loved them. Extremely poignant and touching. And I have tears and I did not notice them building … that is the power of poetry. I know if I read this aloud my voice will catch on certain words and phrases because they are slice like a razor to the heart. Thank you for sending me here. It was a gift well received.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am so glad you liked this. (I got a little worried after I brazenly shoved the link in my comment. What if you didn’t really care for it and you had to think of some polite way to get out of the mess?) But your words are just what a writer hopes to hear, at least this one, and I must confess that my own orbs welled a bit just reading through this. Thank you.

      Liked by 1 person

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