My Life

Flash Backward – #10: The Night I Did Not Break the Internet

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So I innocently signed into Goodreads the other night, something I rarely do anymore. It’s not that I dislike the site; it’s just another one of my former obsessions that I drifted away from as other obsessions developed. This is one of my character traits: I can be completely focused on a specific interest or hobby to the exclusion of everything else in my life, then I wake up one day and think, meh, I’m done with this. And I move on.

The only reason I stopped by Goodreads was that I had received a friend request, and I thought it only polite that I check it out. (Maybe someone read one of my books and actually enjoyed it? Fingers crossed.) As I wiped the dust off my Goodreads control bar, I took note of the extensive backlog of notifications, knowing full well that I wouldn’t care about most of them because I wasn’t interested in attending a book signing in another country and I just didn’t feel the need to join a group wherein we discuss the nuances of post-apocalyptic zombie fiction set in Madagascar.

I quickly ran through the list, deleting things with speedy efficiency (no, no, hell no). Then I noticed that I had a comment from Lorie, one of my blogger pals on WordPress. Hmm. I clicked, and it seems that Lorie had taken the time to watch my video.

Oh God, the video.

You see, many moons ago, when I was a somewhat-virginal blogger and still in that Sally Field “I hope you like me!” phase, I made a video and slapped it on YouTube, with visions of instant stardom populating my unrealistic dreams.  This effort failed miserably and accomplished nothing. (I just checked, and the thing has only had 12 views in five years. I think it set a record, just not the record that I had in mind.) Several moons later, there was a resurgence of my temporary insanity, and I re-posted the video, this time on Goodreads during my obsessive cycle with that site. (I did it mainly to stop the constant reminder on my Author Page: “You haven’t posted a video!” it warned, hinting that government agents might be knocking on my door and hauling me away for insubordination.)

Hundreds of moon phases later, Lorie finds my video. And although I initially cringed that I hadn’t taken the video down, Lorie made a comment that helped me see it in a different way: “I enjoyed hearing your voice for reals after reading you. You sound sincere.”

That made me smile. Because as you grow older, if you’re doing it right, the little things become smaller, the truly important things become bigger, and a random video that you made during younger moons becomes just another color in your kaleidoscope.



15 replies »

  1. “Hey, did anyone ever tell you that you should work in radio? You have ‘THAT VOICE!!!’ ”
    Love the vid…and you’ve inspired me to start putting up random vlogs in my own blog, LOL
    I won’t announce my vlogs – they will appear like magic! Or like some dorky, nerdy, gamer-type crapola that manages to filter out into cyberspace…

    Liked by 1 person

    • I actually enjoyed doing that single vlog, even though I had to make several attempts before I managed to get through the whole thing without making a horrifying snafu of some kind. (It didn’t occur to me that I could just edit together the best bits, like most people do. Sometimes I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed.) As for your own vlogs, I’m ready and waiting. Do it! 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Finally got my volume to work on any YouTube videos..and NO I’m not stalking you ok? I just wanted to say I also like your voice, and LOVE your blogs!! Not many things make me laugh outright, but you do my Friend. Carry on.!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Well, you can stalk me if you want. I’ve always wanted to have a stalker, as long as bloodshed or satanic verses scribbled on my sidewalk doesn’t happen. But more to the point, I’m glad I make you laugh, because you make ME laugh every time I go to your blog… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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