Him: “Today’s outing has been rather enjoyable, my dear, don’t you think?”

Her: “It was interesting, I’ll say that much.”

Him: “You didn’t enjoy it? You didn’t like the feeling of swimming in the ocean? We’ve never done that before.”

Her: “And I still don’t know what it feels like. All I could feel was this damn bathing suit trying to drag me to my death. Entertainment should not involve fighting for your life.”

Him: “I suffered as well. I got salt on my glasses.”

Her: “How typical of you to equate your suffering with mine, once again.”

Him: “Again? Pray tell.”

Her: “Oh, let me see, how about you running around boasting about how we brought a child into this world. We did not do that. You contributed five minutes of heavy breathing and then a rather haphazard dismount. I spent the next nine months with an unruly watermelon crushing my internal organs.”

Him: “It’s going to be one of those days, isn’t it, my love? The photographer is ready. Smile for the camera.”

Her: “Smiling.”