Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #347

SR 1347

Becky: “I sure as hell ain’t goin’ up there.”

Tom: “But Huck said that all the answers we ever wanted are at the top of those stairs.”

Becky: “Huck is a twit. That’s what he gets for runnin’ around barefoot all the time. The stupid just sucks up into your toes.”

Tom: “Why you actin’ that way, Becky? Didn’t we all have a swell time paintin’ that fence?”

Becky: “There wasn’t nothin’ else to do in that dumbass town. I had to do somethin’ to pass the time or I’d end up like that Lizzie Borden with her axe, cuttin’ y’all to pieces. Now that we hijacked that river boat and made it all the way to New Orleans, Loos-iana, I got bigger fish to fry. And why ain’t Huck here to help us out?”

Tom: “Well, he done found him somethin’ called Storyville.”

Becky: “Ain’t they got hookers up in that story place?”

Tom: “Maybe so, don’t really know. We didn’t really have time to talk about it cuz he was runnin’ down the street and said he’d catch up with us later. His dungarees looked kind funny, though, when he was runnin’ and all.”

Becky: “I swear, you are just as simple as he is. He was horny, Tom.”

Tom: “Horny? Like the devil? Why you callin’ him the devil?”

Becky, sighing: “How many kinds of stupid are you? Oh, never mind. Anyway, I’m not goin’ up those stairs. I’m goin’ to Bourbon Street, where a woman can make a fortune just for bein’ a woman. I did not escape a dumbass town just to let opportunities pass me by. I got plans for a better life and I aim to make it happen.”

Tom: “Holy cow, Becky. How do you know so much about the world?”

Becky: “Cuz I watch the Rachel Maddow show on my smartphone.”

Tom: “The what on your what?”

Becky, sighing again: “This is why we have to part ways, Tom. You’re cute and all, but you’re draggin’ a sister down.”


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