Confession: I didn’t really budget my time wisely this week, what with preparing for the Spain trip and all, but since I do want to maintain some regularity and consistency with the “Park” posts, I thought it best to at least put something out. So here we go, Sunday in the Park, accelerated…
ONE. Packing for vacations.
I really wish I could be that person who can cram everything they need for a month in one tiny carry-on, and they still manage to wear a different outfit every day. It’s just a skill set I don’t have.
TWO. The contents of my medicine cabinet.
Remember back when you were a wee bairn and the only medical needs you had involved an occasional band-aid and maybe an aspirin or two? Now? I need a pill for everything I do and for the things I don’t do and should have. There are so many things crammed in my medicine cabinet that opening the door is akin to a piñata exploding.
THREE. The soul-death of waiting around in airports.
Because we were trying to save a bit of money, we picked a cheaper flight arrangement that has us stopping in at least 46 cities between here and Malaga. By the time you read this scheduled post, we will have been flying and laying over for a total of 23 hours just to get to Spain. (And that’s if we make all the connections and everyone cooperates.) Expect at least one future blog post on the matter, if not an epic series full of anguish and pain and possible regret for words that might come out of my mouth.
FOUR. The sheer number of emails in my inbox seeking political contributions.
Apparently there’s an important election this year here in the States. Did you know?
FIVE. An update on the availability of kinky sex at Bonnywood.
Several billion posts ago, I babbled a bit about the eye-opening number of folks who visit this site in search of what I’m assuming to be erotica with at least a light sprinkle of bondage. The driver behind this seems to be some mystical combination of words I used in the second part of a series entitled “Village of the Damned” (which is about a miniature Christmas village, not a full-scale sex camp), resulting in search phrases along the lines of “village of the damned sex story part 2”. Based on the regularity of this phrase (and amusing variations) appearing in my stats, there are apparently a lot of people out there who seek this information. Or perhaps just one person who has no short-term memory.
Since many of you are keenly invested in this tragic tale (at least in my own mind), I thought I’d share with you the latest phrase that was captured in the stats: “damned sexy village part dos”. I especially enjoyed the international flair there at the end, indicating that the seeker thought a bilingual approach might net him better results. In any case, it’s official: Bonnywood Manor is one damn sexy village.
Please try to control your excitement. I know this a titillating development, but management asks that you try to retain your composure as you queue up to gain access to the estate. And no jumping in line. Of any kind.