Past Imperfect – #396
Carole first realized that perhaps she had gotten off at the wrong subway stop when that whiny little girl from The Exorcist began waving about a crucifix…
Sunday in the Park with Brian: Therapy Session #9 (The Performance Anxiety Version)
So, despite the rumors you may have heard in the back alleys of Internet society, I’m a basically decent human being. (No really, I’ll take a blood test. Sign me up!) And, as such, I possess the lovely human quality of being able to get far too stressed […]
Past Imperfect – #394
Mirror: “Wow, that’s never happened to me before.” Jennifer Aniston’s Grandmother: “Are you talking about the crack?” Mirror: “Well, if you mean the break in my glass and not the recreational activity happening in the other room, then yes.” JAG: “Hmm. I’m sure it’s not your fault. Mirrors […]
Present Tense – #9
This is the moment when we were still happy. We were in Malaga, Spain, at the Alcazaba, which is essentially a fortified palace built in the eleventh century, and then modified for several successive centuries. (Because that’s what people did back then. Somebody would build a building, then […]
Past Imperfect – #404
Deep in the Boeing archives, documentary footage exists indicating that perhaps the first engineers at the company did not quite grasp how to put a plane in the air…
Past Imperfect – #401
Gretchen, far left, whispering to Mildred, near left: “Don’t you think there’s something a bit off about this formation?” Mildred: “Whatever do you mean? We’re lined up quite nicely and that small boy over there is already running off to let everyone know that we are promenading in […]
Past Imperfect – #393
Ruby: “Do you seriously want me to wear this?” Director: “Of course I do. You are a woman on the prowl.” Ruby: “With a tail? Why would I have a tail? How many women do you know that have tails? Because I don’t know any.” Director: “It’s symbolism, […]
Sunday in the Park with Brian: Therapy Session #8 (The Name Game Version)
Once again, this week’s Park is essentially going to be about me, which should come as no surprise to anyone who has ever read anything I’ve ever written. Still, there’s at least a minimalist bit of scholastic value to this post, in that we will be chatting about […]
Past Imperfect – #391
Katharine, left: “Let’s make something perfectly clear. I’m the one who gets to sleep with everybody in this boarding house. Not you. Understood?” Ginger, right: “Actually, no. Why do you get all the dibs around here? We both have the same equipment and we both have bills to […]
25 Things I Would Be Doing on a Friday Night If It Was Still 1984
1. Trying to stonewash my own jeans, using bleach, because buying the real thing was too damn expensive. (And failing miserably with the home-school fashion update, effectively destroying the jeans but still having to wear them until I could afford to buy more.) 2. Playing quarters with my […]
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