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A Bonnywood Manor Thanksgiving: Sappy Sentimentality, Crass Commercialism, a Possible Turkey, and Some Pie

Note: This was originally posted three years ago, on the actual Thanksgiving holiday, so please ignore any discombobulation in the time-space continuum as we approach Turkey Day once more here in the United States of Cultural Divide. The main message of the post is still the same…

 

Howdy, folks. So I’m just sitting here and waiting on things to bake. (Yes, I do bake. We don’t need to go into how little effort I actually put into the baking. Let’s just make a quick mental note of it and move on.) And a couple of thoughts are running through my head. First, I’ve been reflecting on the “Harley Crown” series I just re-ran last week, wherein I clumsily fashioned a story around a real attempt to thank the followers of a certain blog of mine back in the day. I really wanted to create a new story for this Thanksgiving so I could show my appreciation for some of the faithful followers of this blog. Sadly, that new story did not happen in time, due to NaNoWriMo and sporadic bouts of laziness wherein I binge-watched HGTV and ate entire boxes of things I shouldn’t be eating.

Secondly, I also recently posted a survey wherein I asked for feedback on my performance with this blog. (Thank you to those who participated, by the way.) One of the surprising things about the results, at least for me, is how many people didn’t realize I have other blogs. This was rather intriguing, as my other blogs are prominently displayed in the sidebar on the right side of the page. [Editor’s Note: My other blogs have been woefully neglected for a while, meaning the posts are a little bit dusty, meaning this paragraph is a bit weak but I still need it as a transition to the next paragraph. Please forgive me.]

And you know what else is displayed over there, featuring a not-pretty photo of me on the Eiffel Tower? The books that I’ve written. If people don’t know about the other blogs, then they probably don’t know about the books. If they don’t know about the books, they don’t buy them. This is a basic example of economic failure. [Editor’s Note: This paragraph has a bit more validity, in that my books are still “currently” for sale. Please love me.]

(Two Disclaimers: One, I realize that some of you have not only purchased the books but you have also posted lovely reviews on Amazon. This part of the story is not directed toward you or your obvious kindness and thoughtfulness. Two, some folks may not be impressed that I’m choosing today to ramble on such a topic. But let’s be fair. Thanksgiving has become a fully-commercialized holiday. Have you heard about this thing called Black Friday? Mmm hmm. Let’s hold our questions until both you and I can see where I’m going with this.)

And in the bigger picture, wherein I finally arrive at the purpose of this post, if people don’t know things about me, what things do I not know about them? And that’s when it hit me. As my own feeble attempt at thanksgiving, why not do a post that is mostly about the visitors here at Bonnywood and not about me? (Okay, so far I’m failing with the “not about me” part, but I’m working toward it. A few more cups of coffee and I might actually get there.) However, if I really want to learn new things about you, then the information has to come from you.

So, let’s do an open forum, marketplace, promotional, confessional, personals ad kind of thing. Tell us about the books you are working on or have written. (Provide links!) Tell us about the business you may have on the side or directly in front of you. (Provide links!) Tell us something silly about the thing that happened that one time, or promote your blog, or just say hello. Essentially, introduce yourself to the rest of the Bonnywood Manor community, even if you’ve never commented before or it’s your first time here.

Examples:

 

Billy Jean at “Not My Lover” writes:

Hey, guys! I just published a book about my Catholic School years called “Burning Bushes and Wild-Eyed Nuns”. Take a look! Click here.

 

Jenny at “867-5309” writes:

I’ve created a series of sculptures with found objects from the Amish country. Completely eco-friendly and guaranteed to be devoid of modern technology. You can find my Etsy site by clicking here.

 

Darkness at “The Shrouded World” writes:

Life is pain. I write all about it on my blog, found here. There’s lots of relentless poetry. Lots.

 

Happy at “This Happy Land of Happiness” writes:

Cats make me really, really happy. I have the biggest collection of cat videos, ever. Come be happy

    with me. We can dress up and Skype each other!

 

Beatrice at “The Crown Matriarch” writes:

On my blog, I will teach you everything you need to know to keep your children from eventually

    becoming tramps. Tough love keeps them out of juvy! Click here.

 

Cathi at “My Cup Didn’t Just Runneth Over, It Exploded” writes:

It’s a fact of life that some of us are better than others. My quirky cooking blog is for others, those of

    us that always get hurt in the kitchen no matter how careful we tried to be. We put safety first and

    taste second, because you can’t enjoy a good meal if you’re in the emergency room.

 

Lysistrata at “The Pancultural Love Center” writes:

Here’s to hoping that every one of you has a wonderful day, and that the two hours you spend

    crammed around a dinner table with people you don’t know and shoving things in your mouth are the

    best two hours you’ve ever spent. Life is what you make it! So say we all.

 

Stephen at “King’s Last Stand” writes:

I’ve written 417 books while most of you were still working on the first chapter of your novella. You

    can find all my massive work on my Amazon page, here. Please wait for the page to load. Their servers

    almost crash every time someone searches on my name.

 

Okay, I think you’ve got the idea. Now, I know that many of you have already shut down emotionally at this point (if you’ve even read this far) and you have no plans whatsoever to participate. And that’s fine. But I know some of you will climb aboard, and hopefully we can make this both fun and interesting. If this effort does really well, turning into a virtual Farmer’s Market, with folks poking and prodding each other’s produce, I will move the link to one of the feature blocks at the top of my page, where it can be evergreen and continue to grow.

If tumbleweeds blow and the comments are barren, I will discreetly pretend that this post never happened.

One last thing, and yes, it’s financial: On Amazon, where my books languish in a dubious stall in a shady part of the market that decent folk don’t visit, you can gift a book to any of your friends and family and all you need is a valid email address for them. And it’s a clever process, in that Amazon actually sends a digital gift card to your friend, in the amount of the current book price, including tax, and then your friend can either get the book or use the gift card for anything else on Amazon. You can get a lot of Christmas shopping done this way, yes? I have no idea if the other digital book sellers do this, since I don’t use them. (Perhaps someone could comment about it, if they know?)

Okay, enough rambling, here are my entries for this “share and share alike” experience:

Both of my published books are humorous (in theory) travelogues, with one concerning an epic adventure in another land and the other concerning a simple day trip to a local amusement park. (Click on the images if you wish to link to Amazon.)

First up we have “Screaming in Paris”, with a reader comment:

 

screaming-in-paris-cover

Snippet from an Amazon review: “Even if you don’t travel, you should read the book for Brian’s hysterical take on family dynamics. I definitely saw my family on page after page. If you’re a reader, a traveler, a family member, or just want to experience a humorous trip to Paris with minimal cost and no passport, start “Screaming!”

 

Next is “Unexpected Wetness”, with one of the various plot synopses I have used over the years:

 

unexpected-wetness-cover-smaller

The world is filled with classic books about loving families overcoming incredible odds so that they can grow even more adorable as a unit, bursting into song at any given moment and wearing matching clothing during boating adventures in non-polluted streams. Next thing you know, producers are knocking on the door and the glowing story has been turned into an inspirational mini-series that is life-affirming, smile-inducing, and contains no trans fat.

This is not one of those stories.

Instead, we tag along with a less-perky family as they navigate the startling minefields of a modern amusement park, a questionable lark that someone in authority should have nipped in the bud but, due to budget cuts, there was no one around with any sense. Wild-eyed and filter-free, they tromped naively through the gates of Six Flags, unaware that they would soon be dealing with vehicular malfunctions, copious tears, regrettable language, the tragic loss of a halter top, and very little singing. (Unless you count the dancing pig.)

Life is too short to make poor entertainment decisions. Or wear ugly shoes.

In the event that your own family should ever develop a hankering to attend a themed venue involving hydraulics and splashing, this mini-travelogue will be more useful than those long ago black-and-white safety films that instructed you to dive under your flimsy school desk should an atomic bomb drop from the sky.

Or you can just read this story for the funny bits. No harm in that. Just be sure to wear something waterproof…

 

And now it’s your turn, with a final urging to just have fun and possibly do some savvy marketing. (Some of us don’t like to self-promote, including me, but since the main point of this post is self-promotion, the comment section would be the place to do it.) No judgement will be passed on any networking efforts that are undertaken. (Unless you get overbearing and offensive, as we frown on that here at Bonnywood.) Ready? Go!

 

 

Previously published in “Bonnywood Manor”. Some changes made in a weak attempt to circumvent the time-space continuum. Bonus development: In reading the comments on that previous post, I found a long-ass response I made that ended with, paraphrasing, “hey, this could be blog post on its own”, yet I never did make that happen. But I think I will make it so tomorrow. Which means that a certain unnamed person named Christi should brace herself for the spotlight. Stay tuned…

 

20 replies »

  1. Hello, my name is Donzelda and I blog about sock puppets. Come join me as I discuss the history of sock puppets (how did they make sock puppets before there were socks? Roman sock puppets – a great place for hiding swords! Amazonian sock puppets, singing sock puppets – so many classic tunes!), sock puppet patterns, impact of sock puppets on world politics (Donald Trump’s lucky sock puppet; he takes it with him for every meeting!), celebrity sock puppets (Kawhi Leonard’s Raptor sock puppet – it’s got teeth!) and so much more! The world of sock puppets is varied and deep and so much fun!!! So drop by and comment about your favourite sock puppets. Or even just your socks. As long as they’re clean. I have strict rules about that. And lots of other things. But don’t worry about that right now. Just stop by. You won’t be sorry.
    😉

    Liked by 2 people

  2. A note to the teacher before I tell about what I did on my summer vacation…err… introduce myself. The sidebar doesnt show when one is reading from a mobile phone unless they choose to view the “desktop site”. I didnt even realize there WAS a sidebar on my own site, or any others.😮

    Hello, I am Angie, also called King Ben’s Grandma. My blog is random and occasionally very silly, just like me. I do prompts or games, sometimes rants or I write about autism, domestic violence, or disability from chronic pain. Usually I write more in comments of blogs I follow than posts on my own blog.
    I’m just here for the punch and pie.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Good point, mentioning the layout difference between laptop/desktop and mobile. (I don’t even recognize my OWN blog when I use my phone.) Still and all, I’m really not all that focused on who sees/clicks on what might be in the outlier regions of my blog. It was just part of the original post and I liked the flow and I’m a little bit lazy, and there you have it.

      As for your own blog, please allow me to gently say this: I find your posts extremely entertaining and real, even when you dip into The Serious Issues, and I would like to see more. (Hint, hint.) Of course, this is much easier to advise than actually do, especially since I don’t know about your daily tribulations and the amount of personal time you might have left over from such. But I think it’s fair to say that we could all benefit from more KBG sprinkles in our lives… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hidey ho there people! Most folks at Bonnywood and a few of the sister blogs regular readers probably know who I am. My blog could be best described as ‘eclectic’ while meaner minds might change that term into something like “the ‘writer’ wanders all over picking berries off an immense number of bushes.” Nobody appears to know exactly what the hell the point might be either. I have one book of poetry published (self published – the elder sister to the now common on-line publishing trend). You might want to check one of the numerous poems I’ve published since my move to WordPress before trying to find that book though. My style might not be yours and sometimes the subject matter is pretty seedy. My blog contains posts about Utah, food, mental health, diabetes, pets (dogs), sarcasm, humor, things that peeve me off, music, word challenges and usage and a whole hell of a lot more. I’m wordy too. But I happen to think that last thing is one of the things the people at Bonnywood (and its host besides) and I have in common. It’s all good and the drinks are cold at Chez Bonnywood. That’s good enough for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve written lots of books, but they are all non-fiction. None are for sale. Most of them explain Australian government programs, policy or advice in plain English. These days I have two blogs. One is devoted to my travels. The other makes me use my hundreds of cookbooks. I make whatever is on page 32.

    Liked by 1 person

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