Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #244

Giselle, on the Right: “Whatever are you working on, darling?”

Veronique, on the Left: “Oh, I’m just jotting down a few notes for when the police arrive. Don’t mind me.”

Giselle: “The police? That seems rather intrusive. Why on earth would they do that?”

Veronique: “Well, I did just happen to kill the man who used to be sitting on the other side of me.”

Giselle: “Really, now? How exciting! Your life is so much more interesting than mine. May I ask what led to this development?”

Veronique: “It was absolutely horrible. He made a negative comment about my hat.”

Giselle: “How appalling! Clearly the man does not recognize Chanel when he sees it, so of course he had to die.”

Veronique: “Precisely. It was a mercy killing, really. Still, it won’t be long before some fool finds his body in the loo and proceeds to make a fuss about the discovery. You know how those working-class people are, always bellowing about something they don’t like.”

Giselle: “Perhaps we should depart, to avoid all that annoying mess with the commoners forgetting who has trust funds and who doesn’t.”

Veronique: “Are you daft? I haven’t finished my coffee yet.”


Previously published. No changes made, which is remarkable because I can rarely resist the urge to tinker. Stay tuned for the sequel, wherein the Man in the Loo has rudely refused to expire and he takes his revenge on Veronique by posing as a waiter and serving her next cup of coffee, just to see the expression on her face. The French are wry that way…


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