Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #569

Henry: “I yearn for you desperately.”

Barbara: “How touching. But as you can see by the perfect curl artfully-arranged on my forehead, I’m not particularly fond of touching. Because it might jack with the curl and I spent far too much time in makeup for such a thing to happen.”

Henry: “It’s not your upper curl that I’m interested in satisfying. I’m thinking of something located at a lower latitude.”

Barbara: “Really, now? And I’m supposed to be impressed that all you care about is my docking station? How utterly juvenile.”

Henry: “You sure talk a lot for someone who has been rubbing up against my wi-fi connection for the last thirty minutes.”

Barbara: “I haven’t been rubbing anything. It’s just that the ludicrous bow in my hair is stuck in the sap on this tree and I’m merely trying to liberate myself. Surely you can understand the difference between wanton exertion and a quest for freedom.”

Henry: “I understand that you’re avoiding your fundamental desires. I’m a man, you’re a woman, and we are both boiling with unrequited satisfaction. It’s basic math.”

Barbara: “A few thoughts on that. One, it doesn’t necessarily take a man and a woman to conjugate a sentence, a variance in my personal life that will not become clear until an unauthorized biography about me is released once I’ve passed. Two, a woman needs a deeper connection with a partner before they surrender the pink. And three, I don’t have that connection with you.”

Henry: “But how can that be? You have to admit that I look really hot in this photo.”

Barbara: “I’ll give you that. But at the end of the day, it’s the little details that count. And I just can’t sleep with someone wearing a suit jacket like yours.”

Henry: “But you’re wearing a jacket as well.”

Barbara: “Yes, but mine is demure and speaks of refinement. Yours speaks of getting high on a Sunday afternoon and watching cartoons for five hours.”

Henry: “I don’t think I make the connection.”

Barbara: “And you never will.”


Previously published, no changes made. (Surprising, right?) But seriously, Henry looks rather dashing in this shot. I’d certainly consider changing internet providers…


29 replies »

  1. The jacket with the sweater vest or just sweater under speaks of confusion to me. And of course he’s hot, he’s wearing far too many items of clothing.

    Oooh, you meant hot and in attractive or the more blunt… “bangable”😉 Yes, both parties are fluffed and folded most fetchingly. I’d not object to either.
    But like our heroine, I need more than a glossy cover. References would be nice, and a note from their doctor would be even nicer.

    Well, that got weird🤪😳🤐 perhaps some sleep is needed😉😴😴💞

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh, it didn’t get weird at all, as I was actually following along with your zig-zagging thoughts quite nicely. It appears that our brain-processing adheres to the same hopscotching pattern. That’s lovely in a bonding way, but the rest of the world should probably be hoping that we use our combined skills for good and not malfeasance. We shall see… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Lust in the forest has always been fraught with problems. Although privacy is usually not of concern, and one might frolic and dock to their utmost content; there’s always some yob who is lost and wanders into a tender moment at just the wrong juncture. Plus pine needles and tree sap are harder to get off one, than a randy suitor. If one of those substances finds it’s way into a nether portal, it is sure to kill the amorous mood stone cold dead. Houndstooth does have one thing to say for it all the same. . It’s sturdy enough to be thrown to the ground, should passion burgeon out of control and the bonds of modesty be slipped, and to take a thorough banging about upon, without undue damage to it. Barbara (who will NEVER be a “Babs” in my universe, she’s far too ‘refined’ for such familiarities) is a bit short-sighted. Because Henry (who looked startling like a very young Tom Hanks) went on to great stardom and fame and associated wealth. Barbara had her own of course, which would have made the coupling all the more satisfying. It’s always good when partners engaging in any activity, including frolics in the woods, are on equal footing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Now, see, this is another fabulous comment you’ve made that’s buried way the hell down in the comment thread. So witty and clever. I really need to do some more posts where I resurface these lonesome treasures that are not getting the attention they deserve. Of course, that would require me to do some actual cultivating and annotating and formulating, and we all know that my attention span is not what it used to be. But I’ll see what I can do…


  3. Is that really Henry Fonda? I watched The Grapes of Wrath long time ago when I was quite into Steinbeck’s books. Anyway, Henry looks quite different than his image here. I agree with Babs that the suit jacket is a bit overly juvenile and flashy. I only saw that in shows and never in real life. How much the sense of fashion and our idea of what is attractive have changed. I mean in many Asian countries, even just two hundred years ago, men wore red, yellow, bright blue and other flashy colors, though not as much as women do, but still quite common. That has completely changed. Men only wear subdued colors now unless it is in some beach resorts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I agree, in that men’s fashions have become much more subdued over the years, in many countries. Even as recently as the 1950s in America, men (for the most part, at least those who could afford it) did not go out of the house without a tie and hat. It was just what you did. Now? It’s just as you say, subdued choices and a lack of style. I’m not saying it’s bad, I’m just saying it’s different…


    • Barb was supposedly voracious in her appetites, choosing entrees from all the pages in the menu. (I wasn’t there, of course, so I cannot confirm.) End of day, as long as you’re happy and no one else gets hurt, wear whatever jacket you want… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

    • I didn’t catch the sweater vest until you mentioned it. Who was thinking what with that choice? Of course, this was before the invention of the Internet, so it’s understandable that Henry’s staff didn’t get an important email…


    • He certainly can. Even as Tom Joad in “The Grapes of Wrath”, where the couture was definitely not haute, Henry just had that look that made me want to put him in my digital shopping cart and proceed to checkout…


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