Author Archives

Brian Lageose

Past Imperfect – #539

Gary Cooper, left: “I’d really prefer it if you would stop clutching me in such a manner.” Jean Arthur, center: “But darling, just because I’ve been convicted of manslaughter and you’ve filed for divorce doesn’t mean that we can’t be friends.” Gary: “We might have to disagree on […]

Frosted June – #3

Claire stood on the back patio, undecided, trying to focus, trying to breathe. It was all simply too much to process, too much to consider. And she had to decide now? It was insane. This morning she had been unaware, concerned with nothing more than which packet of […]

Past Imperfect – #515

Henry: “I told you that I don’t want to talk about it.” Anais: “But Henry, we are both progressive writers who have challenged the world to let us speak freely and openly, without hesitation, about our basic carnality and the ways in which we pursue and express it. […]

Past Imperfect – #524

Awkwardly-Clingy ticket-taker at the Toulouse-Lautrec Metro Station in Paris: “Madamoiselle, I don’t know why you felt compelled to leap over the turnstile whilst bellowing something in Swedish, but I can’t have you running amok in the bowels of this city without acknowledging fair trade agreements. It’s anarchy!” PETA-defying […]

Past Imperfect – #555

Betty was a bit concerned. She could hear the folks outside her dressing room, babbling about the thing that someone had done to the actress in the other dressing room. Betty was fully aware of the thing, because she had done it. But she thought she had done […]

Past Imperfect – #564

Larry: “What fresh hell is this?” Jennie: “It appears that an army of photographers is aware of the fact that we were having a meeting with a marriage counselor. I wonder how that might have happened, He Who Can’t Keep His Mouth Shut.” Larry: “I assure you I […]