Author Archives

Brian Lageose

Past Imperfect – #388

Reporter: “Hey, gals. I couldn’t help but notice that you’re all pointing guns at me. Is there something I need to know in this situation?” Daisy, left: “Oh, sorry. We ain’t tryin’ to kill you or nothin’. We’re just practicin’ so we can be better shooters and improve […]

Past Imperfect – #198

The next day, all of the speaker boxes in Row Two were in mourning, as one of their own had been felled. The night before, a truck full of rednecks from Pawhuska had failed to roll down their window and disengage the audio contraption as they were leaving, […]

Past Imperfect – #354

It was a Sisterhood Rule understood by all conscientious women: If you suddenly realize that everyone in your entourage has failed miserably with their coiffures for the day, you must divert attention from your follicular tragedies by engaging in inexplicable behavior. In this case, the members of the […]

Idiot Fondue: Case Study – #13

Background Note: This is a post from one of my long-abandoned sites wherein I assumed the persona of a pompous therapist and answered “real” questions submitted by the readers. Enjoy.   Dear Dr. Brian, Why do people try to put round pegs in square holes? submitted by Serena […]

Past Imperfect – #358

Mae: “You know, something just occurred to me.” Jimmy: “And what are your thoughts, my special lady of the evening? Are you rapturously satisfied after my stellar boudoir performance?” Mae: “Oh. Did we have sex? I didn’t realize. Perhaps I was distracted.” Jimmy: “Surely you are at least […]