Marlene Dietrich, moody but talented: “Do I look like I’m impressed with this outfit?” Director, obscure but arty: “Well, no. But you never look impressed with anything. Has anybody ever actually seen your teeth? “ Marlene: “I never smile. Smiling is for lazy people.” Director: “Should I mention […]
Hyacinth Macaw, prosecuting attorney and generally unpleasant person, stood up at her document-laden table and made an announcement: “I’m ready to cross-examine the witness on the stand.” Judge Pearline Soufflé did not stand up at her hand-carved bench, one that was not laden with anything because she was […]
As I was prepping this piece, I struggled, as I usually do, with finding the right words for the introduction. After fifty-odd spotlights, it’s become increasingly difficult to come up with a unique intro that feels fresh and non-repetitive. After all, how many different ways can you say […]
Tallulah was thoroughly unimpressed with her assigned role when the cast was announced for the 1926 London premiere of “A Yankee Thanksgiving: This Is What Happens When You Defy a British Monarch and Hop on a Boat Bound for a Colony That Has No Indoor Plumbing”. The play […]
Greta, the wife, left: “Is this what it’s come to, with this massive table representing the distance in our marriage?” Felix, the servant, fiddling with who knows what, center, whispering: “Girl, don’t poke the bear. You know he has unregulated testosterone issues.” Anders, husband, possible bear, right: “Whatever […]
Note: The following repost was inspired by a recent comment, wherein Osyth and I were discussing my brief career as a thespian and she mentioned “I don’t know your voice but we have imagination”. Well, I just happen to have something in the archives that might shed a […]
Cary: “So, did you sneak in the hacksaw so I can cut through these bars and blow this joint?” Katharine: “I might have. Or maybe I didn’t. You need to answer some questions first.” Cary: “I got nothin’ else to do in here except hope that I don’t […]
Hey, folks. I’ve purposely not written a post specifically about the stunning insurrection that occurred at the Capitol last Wednesday, because I knew I wasn’t in the right head space to properly address it. I was too angry, too sad, too outraged, too everything to properly process the […]
It was at this point that Gladys and Lottie realized that things might be a wee bit out of control. Then again, perhaps it hadn’t been the wisest move to don lackadaisical attire in a town where everyone else took couture quite seriously. Perhaps it was time for […]
Amazon Operator: “How may I direct your call?” Katharine: “I need to speak with someone about my order.” Operator: “May I ask about the nature of your concern?” Katharine: “They sent me the wrong thing, that’s my concern.” Operator: “I see. And what were you expecting to get?” […]
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