Category: Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #204

Colleen: “I don’t mean to be rude, but who the hell are you and why are you in my dressing room?” Virginia: “Thank you for asking. Well, I just happened to be walking by your penthouse, because I don’t have anything more important to do, and I could […]

Past Imperfect – #244

Giselle, on the Right: “Whatever are you working on, darling?” Veronique, on the Left: “Oh, I’m just jotting down a few notes for when the police arrive. Don’t mind me.” Giselle: “The police? That seems rather intrusive. Why on earth would they do that?” Veronique: “Well, I did […]

Past Imperfect – #434

Crystal, left: “Do you have any idea what we’re supposed to be doing in this scene?” Methal, right: “Beats me. Something about innocent virgins in the forest being stalked by men with unresolved childhood issues. They had ten-cent drinks at Piero’s last night, so I barely looked at […]

Past Imperfect – #295

Irene: “When I was a little girl, I dreamed of standing outside a wagon-wheeled bungalow while a dark-haired man tried to win my affections.” Cary: “How fascinating. When I was a little girl, I dreamed of wearing questionable socks and glossy short-shorts.” Irene: “That doesn’t sound right. Are […]

Past Imperfect – #296

At the start of the photo shoot, Clara had been very excited about being aboard a sailing ship on a beautiful day. The sun was shining, the seagulls were making delightful gull noises, the gently bobbing waves were soothing, and the refreshing salty breeze reminded her of many […]

Past Imperfect – #199

With the introduction of the Otis Autotronic Elevator on Tulane Street in New Orleans, Bridgette was hired as a spokesperson to allay the fears of the local citizenry that placing your faith in a moving metal box could lead to debauchery and Democratic-voting. Sadly, Bridgette was unable to […]

Past Imperfect – #459

Archaeologist #1: “What the hell is that?” Archaeologist #2: “Well, based on my research notes, this appears to be a rare specimen from the Golden Age of Hollywood.” Archaeologist #1: “What made that age golden?” Archaeologist #2: “I’m assuming it was a time when humans were able to […]

Past Imperfect – #188

Dr. Machismo, addressing his Psychology 101 class: “Students, in this classic snapshot, the photographer has managed to capture the full range of male sexuality. A lovely maiden is simply trying to transport a freshly-picked butternut squash to the Rome apartment of her beloved grandmother, Mary Elizabeth Catherine Marie […]

Past Imperfect – #39

Ernst: “I’m so sorry. Have you been waiting an eternity, my love?” Greta: “What does my face say?” Ernst: “Your beautiful face says that I should remain over here until I ensure that you don’t have a sharp weapon tucked under your napkin.” Greta: “Well, that’s part of […]

Past Imperfect – #109

  The Thompson Triplets, with their intense patriotism and even stronger attraction to men in uniform, never missed a troop train rolling into town. They collectively had a total of 47 children, with a surprising number of them named “Junior”, which caused confusion at church picnics. This population […]