Category: Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #39

Ernst: “I’m so sorry. Have you been waiting an eternity, my love?” Greta: “What does my face say?” Ernst: “Your beautiful face says that I should remain over here until I ensure that you don’t have a sharp weapon tucked under your napkin.” Greta: “Well, that’s part of […]

Past Imperfect – #38

Mellie, having finally gotten her things in order: “Momma, I’m ready!” Momma, apparently somewhere else in the house because she clearly isn’t in this picture: “Ready for what, dear? Breakfast? Give me a few minutes, I’m almost done.” Mellie, obviously unaware that her collar was all jacked-up even […]

Past Imperfect – #107

Anne hit the perfect-husband jackpot when she found a man who did what he was told, didn’t have to be fed, never argued, put her on a pedestal, and provided her with an endless supply of luxury footwear. Of course, procreation was going to prove interesting, and she […]

Past Imperfect – #197

Director: “I’m sorry, what are you trying to accomplish with that pose?” Actress: “I’m showing the inner torment of my character.” Director: “When did your character become a pouty mermaid? We don’t even have any water in this film.” Actress: “Isn’t that a picture of the Titanic behind […]

Past Imperfect – #136

Lupe was startled when she learned that the censors objected to her performance in this scene. After all, this was years before that horrid little man, Will Hays, came up with the insipid Production Code that edited anything remotely naughty out of the movies. Interestingly enough, the censors […]

Past Imperfect – #195

Driver #909: “Heads up, #937. Whatever you do, don’t pick up a guy wearing a Dallas Cowboys t-shirt and a belt buckle the size of a Buick. He’s smashed on hurricanes and hollering some crazy nonsense about Texas becoming its own country.  Nobody cares but he won’t shut […]

Past Imperfect – #94

Angelina was not in a festive mood. She had only agreed to pose for the up-and-coming photographer due to a whimsical bet that had gone awry at the country club. Then there was that whole mess with some government guy wanting to speak with her about the legal […]

Past Imperfect – #233

Casting Director: “Okay, what exactly are you trying to say with this photo in your portfolio? It comes across as a little… odd. Help me out a bit.” Jean: “Well, I was conveying my glamorous side, that I can do high-society roles. I can hold my own against […]