Category: Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #137

Stephanie was not having a very good day. She had arisen that morning later than she had planned, the unintended but not surprising result of having spent much of the previous evening on an ill-fated agenda of clearing the sexual cobwebs, so to speak. (It had been three […]

Past Imperfect – #113

The progressive crowd at this trendy Greenwich Village nightclub was thrilled when Millicent and Penelope dared to openly show their love in a public setting. In reality, there was no showing, there was only Millie’s brooch becoming ensnared in Penny’s décolletage as they both raced to get the […]

Past Imperfect – #348

“Hi, my name is Any Woman, and I was a prostitute in the infamous Storyville section of New Orleans, and my voice from the past is here to warn you that one hundred years later there will still be Republican men who will do everything they can to […]

Past Imperfect – #194

By posing for this photo, Bill and Mary Franklin are adding weight to the theorem that couples in long-term relationships tend to start looking like one another. In the left background, Bill Junior is saddened by the vision of what his future holds. In the further right background, […]

Past Imperfect – #149

Under the boardwalk, they might be havin’ some fun, but up top folks were running for their lives after Clarence made it quite clear that he was absent in etiquette class when they discussed gastro-intestinal disturbances…   Previously published in “Crusty Pie”.

Past Imperfect – #376

On the movie set, preparing for Take 107. Bette, on the left: “I don’t know how much more of this I can stand. They’ve got me trussed up like Heidi in a methadone clinic, the entire script is only two pages, and the amount of testosterone in this […]

Past Imperfect – #260

Photographer: “Giselle, I need you to show more emotion. You look like you’re having a root canal.” Giselle: “But Henri, there are always the cameras in my life. I am bored and unsatisfied.” Henri: “You are wearing the latest fashions from the hottest designer, Chanel de Coco Puffs. […]

Past Imperfect – #200

Theresa, left: “You could have told me that the window was open. If I had known that, I wouldn’t have slapped my lover and he wouldn’t have fallen out of it.” Barbara, right: “That’s your own personal issue. I have problems of my own. Like this damn skirt […]

Past Imperfect – #388

Reporter: “Hey, gals. I couldn’t help but notice that you’re all pointing guns at me. Is there something I need to know in this situation?” Daisy, left: “Oh, sorry. We ain’t tryin’ to kill you or nothin’. We’re just practicin’ so we can be better shooters and improve […]

Past Imperfect – #198

The next day, all of the speaker boxes in Row Two were in mourning, as one of their own had been felled. The night before, a truck full of rednecks from Pawhuska had failed to roll down their window and disengage the audio contraption as they were leaving, […]