Category: Past Imperfect

Past Imperfect – #327

It was the wedding of the decade, with the rich and famous for miles around flocking to view the nuptials. The reception afterwards was a smashing success, with the flashbulbs of the paparazzi lighting up the night and the gossip columnists rhapsodizing in the evening editions of all […]

Past Imperfect – #560

Ricardo: “I sense that you have something to say.” Carole: “I always have something to say. But there are rare occasions when I have enough decorum about me to realize that I shouldn’t say something. This is why I’m not looking at you, so you won’t ask me […]

Past Imperfect – #577

Once upon a time, Ronald Reagan, Donald Trump and Joe Biden walked into a bar… Ronnie, left: “Some day I’m gonna be president.” Trumpy, middle: “Why would you do that? Is there any money in it?” Joey, right: “I’m gonna be president, too. But first I’m gonna be […]

Past Imperfect – #141

Note: I yanked this one out of the archives due to the “Fantasy Island” discussion a few posts back… Bather #1: “I just found out about a place called Fire Island! I understand that I can find my people there. I can’t begin to tell you how excited […]

Past Imperfect – #586

Jedediah, left: “Oh, good form with the jump. Excellent execution, I must say.” Stephanie: “Why, thank you. I rather enjoyed it. Especially when the wind gusted up and I got a zing on my bing.” Jedediah: “You got a who on your what?” Stephanie: “Perhaps I should clarify […]

Past Imperfect – #554

Heidi, apparently just back from Rehab: “Grandpa, I missed you so.” Grandpa, apparently in need of such: “And I missed you, too, little… um… I’m sorry. I can’t recall your name. Our family breeds like rabbits on moonshine and there are 47 girls running about who look just […]

Past Imperfect – #520

Cary: “Why are you walking in the door like that? Jean: “Let’s just say there was an incident and things didn’t work out well for me.” Cary: “But you look like you’re in pain? What happened?” Jean: “Well, apparently I made the mistake of trying to wear high […]