1. Don’t make one. This is the best method of preventing humiliation and discomfort in a clinical establishment populated with people wearing designer scrubs and shoving needles in your arm. Sadly, your body often chooses to ignore this plan, and insists on having something go awry with one […]
“I love you more than beer.” “You complete my bobble-head collection.” “You tractor-pulled my heart.” “Your eyes sparkle like moonshine.” “You are the prettiest girl in the Wal-Marts parking lot.” “I love you like a sister. Oh wait…” “Love means never having to say which one of them […]
I just wanted a quick something to eat, folks. That’s it. And here we go… 1. I was nearly killed, Part I. There I was, traveling along in my car, bellowing along with Adele as she set fire to the rain. (Isn’t it amazing how the lack of […]
I had a question come up on my Q&A group in GoodReads that went something like this: “When did you decide that you wanted to be an author/writer? Tiffany” I happen to know Tiffany. Fairly well, actually. And I knew that she was just being sweet and trying […]
Note: Many thanks to the fine folks who suggested phrases for this second edition… 1. “Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!” Translation: “I am completely stunned by this unexpected turn in our conversation. And since I didn’t have an adequate response I decided to just […]
1. “Well, sugar my foot!” Translation: “I am thoroughly astonished that what you just said is actually true. Even if it’s really not.” This is a response often heard during whispered gossip sessions at the local Baptist church. 2. “That thing just flopped back yonder.” Translation: “The […]
“Don’t come into my cube unless you can get to the point within four seconds.” “Why do you have to yell everything you say? Is that how they do it on your home planet?” “Let’s just assume that your amazing niece did something extraordinary once […]
Greetings. It’s been a bit since I posted a “new” piece on this blog, having resorted to dragging out dusty bits that I had already posted on my other blogs in years past. There’s a fair amount of shame associated with doing so, this recycling business, but sometimes […]
1. People don’t pay any attention to what’s going on around them. This is a general theme in all of his books, with the townsfolk taking forever to figure out that something is not quite right in their little burgh. Sure, we always have ONE character who […]
Bonnywood Manor 
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