I basically enjoyed it, but I still cried a little bit. Wait, perhaps I’m getting a smidge ahead of myself. Let’s rewind a day or six. Last Friday eve, as I was innocently watching something innocuous on the telly with Partner, my phone pinged. I glanced at such, […]
In this snapshot from 1920, patrons at Whitey’s Pub and Bordello react to the news that women were just given the right to vote with the 19th Amendment. (Notice that there are only two people smiling: the bar-back on the far right, who apparently later gave birth to […]
There are monkeys on top of the Rock of Gibraltar. Did you know this? I certainly didn’t. Well, that’s not entirely fair to say. One of our travelling companions, a lovely lass that I’ll call “Twyla” for now, because I haven’t mentioned to her that I might ensnare […]
Let’s eavesdrop on the wedding participants’ thoughts, shall we? Left to right. Conrad “Nicky” Hilton: “I am so glad that Elizabeth Taylor agreed to marry me. I’m sure her decision had nothing to do with my family being so wealthy that we can buy elections and entire countries.” […]
Note: I realize it’s not Friday, but I just stumbled across this one in the archives and felt compelled to share it again. Enjoy. For this week’s Bake, we’ll be sticking with the trivia angle, although I’m switching from music to acting. (Before you run screaming from the […]
1. The constant nipple protrusion. When the temperature drops, my hi-beams come on. For hours at a time. And with an intensity that is mildly frightening. Some of my shirts are so lacerated at pec level that it looks like Edward Scissorhands dropped by for a drunken game […]
To: Our Beloved Guests RE: The Crapfest Weather of the Last Several Days Which Has Led to Unappreciated Variances in What You Expect Out of Life First and foremost, I must thank you for your generous patience as we work our way through this wretchedly woeful wallop. Said […]
“I love you more than beer.” “You complete my bobble-head collection.” “You tractor-pulled my heart.” “Your eyes sparkle like moonshine.” “You are the prettiest girl in the Wal-Marts parking lot.” “I love you like a sister. Oh wait…” “Love means never […]
Fair Warning: I’m a little bit cranky in this ancient bit of venting, as evidenced by the title. Brace yourselves accordingly… 1. Idiots don’t know what snow is. Stunning as it may seem, there are folks out there who are completely mystified by the white stuff falling from […]
Douglas, left: “Why are both of you looking at me like you know something that I don’t?” Jean, middle: “I’m not looking at anybody. When you use as much peroxide on your hair as I do, you lose a little bit of muscle control.” James, right: “I might […]
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