Vivien: “I see that you are sweating. Are you finally ready to admit that you want me more than anything in the world?” Marlon: “Nope, that’s not it. Some drunk guy on Bourbon Street threw his beer at me.” Vivien: “Oh, so that’s the game you’re playing. Making […]
Gisela: “Oh, that looks like the perfect house to flip so we can make a ton of money by simply ripping out all the interior walls and making it an open floor plan.” Boyd: “I don’t know. Maybe we shouldn’t mess with this one. I did some research […]
The prosecuting attorney dramatically flourished Exhibit A: “As you can see by this photo, drug usage was rampant at the Beverly Hills Tennis Club in 1932!” Defense Attorney: “And what, other than your well-known alcoholism, led you to this questionable conclusion?” Prosecution: “First of all, we have Gilbert […]
Director: “I’m sorry, what are you trying to accomplish with that pose?” Actress: “I’m showing the inner torment of my character.” Director: “When did your character become a pouty mermaid? We don’t even have any water in this film.” Actress: “Isn’t that a picture of the Titanic behind […]
Jimmy Stewart, left: “What the hell are you doing?” Norma Shearer, right: “Sweetie, I know you were born in Pennsylvania, and I can forgive you for that. But you are really drawing too much attention to our table with your ‘golly gee’ expression. Tone it down a notch.” […]
As Zelda walked into the Gamma Bamma Slamma sorority house for her interview, she was not at all disturbed by the exuberant smoking, the obvious fact that none of them had a professional stylist, or even the aura of possible lesbianism. She was, however, a bit concerned that […]
Angie really, really wanted to be a flapper, but it turned out that she just really wasn’t all that good at it. Perhaps the first sign of failure was the complete stranger trying to physically restrain her flapping before we were all treated to a rustic tableau that […]
At first glance, this appears to be an image of the Muse that eventually inspired Stevie Nicks to go into her vagabond-gypsy/possible-witch musical phase. In reality, this is just a poignant study of a very sad woman who was unable to master the craft of Cat’s Cradle. She […]
Note: Change the pronouns around however you like to fit the dynamics of your own relationship. This is an equal-opportunity whine-fest, and all variations of love are fully embraced here at Bonnywood Manor. 1. He changes the car radio right in the middle of a song that […]
Therapist: “Let’s try a new exercise, mainly because all of the other exercises have failed to get you to emotionally adjust in any satisfactory way. Why don’t we spend the rest of our session with you thinking of things you wished someone had said to you as an […]
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