There was a gasp in the courtroom, followed by silence. All eyes turned toward the judge, curious as to how she might take that last remark. Ima Beansprout sighed, took off her glasses, rubbed her eyes, then turned to the defendant in the witness box, clearly not satisfied […]
Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, with yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to… wait a minute. Where are the feathers? Where’s the DRESS? Something is clearly amiss in Gotham City, and we must find out more. Let’s eavesdrop on the scene […]
1. The Deception. One must never allow the feline to view the cat carrier until it is absolutely necessary. If unplanned, premature viewing takes place, the cat will instantly head for Venezuela. This will happen even if they are playing frenziedly with their favorite toy or intensely grooming […]
Clarissa, left: “Bernadette, honey, I don’t know if you were right about this hat.” Bernadette, right: “Don’t be silly. It’s terribly fashionable and it makes a statement.” Clarissa: “The statement it’s making is that I can’t see a damn thing. I’m just looking in the direction of your […]
Photographer: “Excuse me, Miss Dunaway. What exactly are you and your leg doing?” Faye: “I’m photographing you photographing me. It’s all the rage in the art scene after Antonioni started doing it when he directed Blow-Up. And artsy people really enjoy doing obscure things based on obscure Italian […]
I think it’s no secret by now that I really enjoy finding a blog where the writer is constantly surprising me, crafting a variety of pieces that experiment with modes of expression. This is the case with Evelyn’s work, where sometimes we go light, sometimes we go a […]
Humphrey Bogart: “I told you to stop arguing with me. Don’t you understand that I have a gun pointed at you?” Bette Davis: “But that’s what I’m talking about. I can’t take that gun seriously. Did you steal it from one of the munchkins in The Wizard of […]
1. If you have stupidly stored an important item in a basement where the light flickers, you just need to forget about it and buy a new one. 2. If the hotel clerk hands you the registration book for you to sign, and the page is dusty and […]
You know the drill. All you really meant to do was lie down for just a second or two, letting your body regroup after that ill-advised Chinese buffet. You pick up a trashy magazine, barely finish the first paragraph, and the next thing you know it’s two […]
Before Colleen could fully grasp what was happening in her previously-pleasant garden, the members of the Cherry Tree Gang went rogue and cornered her near the Koi pond, demanding more sunlight and better fertilizer. Harsh negotiations ensued…
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