Father: “You’ve disappointed me again, Clara.” Clara: “Whatever could you mean, Father?” Father: “Coming home drunk again, all tarted up and messy.” Clara: “How could you possibly think I was drink?” Father: “”Because you’re talking to the hat rack over there, and I’m over here.” Clara: “Oh. I […]
PR Consultant: “Wow. What exactly were you thinking when you posed for this photo?” Myrna: “Well, initially I thought it would be a brave depiction of what Hollywood actresses look like without all the glamour and makeup.” PR Consultant: “Uh huh. And did you have any second thoughts?” […]
For this week’s Bake, we’ll be sticking with the trivia angle, although I’m switching from music to acting. (Before you run screaming from the room, sit your ass back down. I’ll be offering clues this time, so it should not be as traumatic. And here, take some of […]
This Broadway show closed precisely two minutes after it opened. No one ever spoke of it again…
Flapper #1: “I really need to win this audition, so I made a bold statement with my hat and I almost let people see my France. Of course, I’m always running about and flashing my France, so this really isn’t different than any other day for me. But […]
Director: “I’m sorry, what are you trying to accomplish with that pose?” Actress: “I’m showing the inner torment of my character.” Director: “When did your character become a pouty mermaid? We don’t even have any water in this film.” Actress: “Isn’t that a picture of the Titanic behind […]
Casting Director: “Okay, what exactly are you trying to say with this photo in your portfolio? It comes across as a little… odd. Help me out a bit.” Jean: “Well, I was conveying my glamorous side, that I can do high-society roles. I can hold my own against […]
Joan: “Oh, my lover, you excite me so.” Cliff: “Really? That’s news to me. I’ve seen stronger signs of life at a mortuary.” Joan: “Oh, silly, this is such a romantic setting. How could I not be in the mood?” Cliff: “Romantic? This is a fake park bench […]
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