Evelyn: “What on earth are you doing in my apartment? And why are you holding my diaphragm case?” Inspector: “Is that what this is? I thought maybe you were collecting those little Jewish hats. But since we’re on the subject, why is this case encrusted with rhinestones?” Evelyn: […]
Off-camera person that we cannot see because this shot was poorly planned: “Excuse me. Do you have time for a few questions?” Brian, center: “That depends. Who are you and why are you holding a microphone?” Person: “My name is Humadora von Swizzlestick. But you can call me […]
Note: I yanked this one out of the archives due to the “Fantasy Island” discussion a few posts back… Bather #1: “I just found out about a place called Fire Island! I understand that I can find my people there. I can’t begin to tell you how excited […]
Brian, left: “What the hell are you doing? I’m standing here looking incredibly sexy even though there seems to be something neutered going on with my pants.” Mary, right: “I’m just so fed up with people I want to scream and bang on something loud.” Brian: “Okay. Are […]
Despite the dreary London weather, Lady Penelope was still very excited about being in the Royal Procession to christen the newest bidet installed at Buckingham Palace. She could hardly wait to queue up at a place where queueing up would soon become standard procedure. There was a knock […]
The final scene of the play was a smashing success, with critics on their feet, rhapsodizing in the way that certain critics do when they decide to pluck a mundane play out of obscurity and then trumpet it as The Second Coming. Admittedly, the story was mildly powerful […]
During the opening night of “Chernobyl: The Musical!”, a bevy of conversations took place… Jan, far left: “I had no idea what I was getting into when I joined this chorus line. I mean, a girl’s gotta make a living and all that, but this is ridiculous. […]
Marlon, center left: “Honey, these gentlemen would like to speak to you about our houseboy who went missing last night.” Elizabeth, center right: “Why on earth would they think I had anything to do with that?” Marlon: “Well, it’s your hair, dear. It’s obvious that it can’t be […]
Off-camera person that we cannot see because this shot was poorly planned: “Excuse me. Do you have time for a few questions?” Brian, center: “That depends. Who are you and why are you holding a microphone?” Person: “My name is Humadora von Swizzlestick. But you can call me […]
Little Sally: “Are we really supposed to eat that? It looks like roadkill.” Little Billy: “I know it’s not pretty. But it’s only a month until Christmas and you know what that means.” Little Sally: “That there will be another one of these dead birds on the table?” […]
Bonnywood Manor 
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