Click here to read Part 1 of my loving tribute to the Yuletide Season. (Fair admission: This Part is not quite as loving as the First Part.) Or you can just plunge right in… 4. The madness of idiots who have somehow passed a driving test at some […]
1. Getting all that crap out of the attic. Dragging boxes out of their non-holiday nursing home wasn’t such a big deal 20 years and 30 pounds ago. It wasn’t my favorite activity even then, but I could generally haul the goods in less than 15 minutes […]
Note: It’s the holiday season, which means it’s also time for me to drag out some of my admittedly over-shared “Christmas” posts. Let’s start with this one, a reflection on priorities. And yes, “Crate & Barrel” is a real chain of fancy-ass emporiums. Ah, that time of year […]
Him: “So, it’s happening again, is it?” Her: “I’m afraid so. It’s Christmas time in the city.” Him: “Silver bells and snowy WordPress themes?” Her: “Ring-a-ling and hear them ping.” Him: “You know, when I was a wee lad, I really enjoyed Christmas. So much wonder and hope.” […]
Cleo the Cat: “Who the hell is Elvis?” Scotch the Cat: “I don’t know. Wait, maybe I do. He’s the one who sings about a Boo Boo Christmas. I always have a boo boo Christmas. I make boo boos every day and then wait for the Magic Scoop […]
And so it was As I pondered tonight What should I post What should I write Many folks are busy With kith and with kin Anything I scribble Will hit the dust bin Unseen and forlorn Lost in the fray Of folks celebrating The spirit of […]
Yes, I realize that I just did a “Golden Girls” post not that long ago, and this one ends somewhat the same way. But this is an older piece, more stylized than the previous one, and for me it feels like an episode in the series, albeit an […]
Note: Another twisted chestnut from my archival stocking, thus explaining a few of the dated references… 1. Slim Jims from the corner convenience store. [Take cheap plastic meat out of cheap plastic packaging prior to arrival. Wrap meat in the ugly silk scarf that Cousin Edna tossed your […]
Off-camera person that we cannot see because this shot was poorly planned: “Excuse me. Do you have time for a few questions?” Brian, center: “That depends. Who are you and why are you holding a microphone?” Person: “My name is Humadora von Swizzlestick. But you can call me […]
Clara’s Diary: December 24th, late. So I met this guy. I was at a bar in West Hollywood, that part of town where all the set decorators live. I really only went in there because I really needed to pee. We’d been to the Cocoanut Grove earlier, and […]
Bonnywood Manor 
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