Jane: “I feel compelled to report an issue with my accommodations.” Hairaldo: “You look like you are compelled about a lot of things. And why is your dress stapled to your bosom?” Jane: “That’s not important. I didn’t sleep well at all last night.” Hairaldo: “Did you remember […]
Dear Guests, Patrons and People Who Would Much Rather Be Anywhere Else but They’ve Already Paid for Their Tickets and They Might as Well Get Some Free Shrimp Dip Out of It, “Thank you for joining us on yet another night of Bonnywood’s Annual Cultural Arts Festival […]
Dear Guests, Patrons and People That Procreate Without Understanding What That Really Means, Thank you for joining us on this fifth night of Bonnywood’s Annual Cultural Arts Festival and Bacchanalia. Since this opening monologue is starting to get a bit repetitive and mundane, I thought I’d spice […]
Dear Guests, Patrons and People That I May or May Not Have Slept with But No Longer Recall If I Did So, “Thank you for joining us on this fourth night of Bonnywood’s Annual Cultural Arts Festival and Bacchanalia. I’m sure you’re just as excited as I […]
Dear Guests, Patrons and Those People Who Are Not as Funny as They Think They Are When Drinking, Thank you for joining us on this third night of Bonnywood’s Annual Cultural Arts Festival and Bacchanalia. Before we get started with this evening’s presentation, I feel compelled to […]
Claudia was very impressed with her image in the antique mirror, as were the 13 Cuban refugees hidden under her dress and waiting for the signal that they had reached the American shore. Cleopatra the Cat, wandering up as I type. “That’s an extremely insensitive thing to write […]
Dear Guests, Patrons and People Who Just Show Up for the Free Booze, Thank you for joining us here at Bonnywood for our Annual Cultural Arts Festival and Bacchanalia. To kick off this evening’s events, we’ll be reviewing the first submission in our esteemed 3-Word Challenge, an […]
Andrea de Voluptua, reporting live from the scene: “I’m here at Esparza’s Mexican Restaurant, formerly known as Guero’s prior to yet another insipid corporate takeover, where police officials confirm that someone has done something they shouldn’t have. It’s not really clear what crime has been committed because details […]
New Intro: Since so many of you have (perhaps reluctantly) hopped on board with the 3-Word Challenge, I thought I’d drag out this bit where I took the challenge myself… The Birth of the 3-Word Challenge: Sushi in the Sky, With Rhinestones Editor’s Note: Many years ago, […]
Nora: “Darling, must we really do this?” Nick: “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Nora: “Of course you have an idea. You have an odd-looking piece of artillery positioned precisely above your crotch. I’m not sure what you’re trying to prove. We are both fully aware […]
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