Tag: Film

Past Imperfect – #39

Ernst: “I’m so sorry. Have you been waiting an eternity, my love?” Greta: “What does my face say?” Ernst: “Your beautiful face says that I should remain over here until I ensure that you don’t have a sharp weapon tucked under your napkin.” Greta: “Well, that’s part of […]

Past Imperfect – #197

Director: “I’m sorry, what are you trying to accomplish with that pose?” Actress: “I’m showing the inner torment of my character.” Director: “When did your character become a pouty mermaid? We don’t even have any water in this film.” Actress: “Isn’t that a picture of the Titanic behind […]

Past Imperfect – #94

Angelina was not in a festive mood. She had only agreed to pose for the up-and-coming photographer due to a whimsical bet that had gone awry at the country club. Then there was that whole mess with some government guy wanting to speak with her about the legal […]

Past Imperfect – #233

Casting Director: “Okay, what exactly are you trying to say with this photo in your portfolio? It comes across as a little… odd. Help me out a bit.” Jean: “Well, I was conveying my glamorous side, that I can do high-society roles. I can hold my own against […]

Past Imperfect – #211

Ginger: “Well, I guess there might be some truth to the rumor that California is sliding into the ocean.” Photographer: “It’s just the pills, dear. The room isn’t actually tilting.” Ginger: “The pills? My happy snacks?” Photographer: “Yes, those. Maybe you shouldn’t take so many of them.” Ginger: […]

Past Imperfect – #216

Producer: “I just want to know what drugs you were taking when you came up with this promo shot. Because I want to make sure that I never take them myself.” PR Consultant: “But, isn’t this movie about a lost Italian princess who falls in love with Frosty […]

Past Imperfect – #419

Clark: “I just realized something.” Claudette: “That I’m trapped in the gravitational pull of one of your giant ears?” Clark: “Look, I warned you about those things. Don’t get too close unless you’re firmly tied to a boat anchor.” Claudette: “But I am. I’m latched to what’s left […]

Past Imperfect – #162

Jean-Claude: “Why are you making such a big deal about getting out of bed?” Bernadette: “Because this is a French film. I must ponder all philosophical implications before taking any action. Right now, I am thinking of the underpaid workers who built this hotel. The suffering, the torment, […]

Past Imperfect – #418

Awards Show Producer, rushing on stage and out of breath: “Ladies, we’re having a bit of difficulty with the sound, mainly because the last actress on the stage was rather enamored by the shape of the microphone and she took it home as her, um, date for the […]