Tag: Hollywood

Past Imperfect – #405

Before Colleen could fully grasp what was happening in her previously-pleasant garden, the members of the Cherry Tree Gang went rogue and cornered her near the Koi pond, demanding more sunlight and better fertilizer. Harsh negotiations ensued…  

Past Imperfect – #197

Director: “I’m sorry, what are you trying to accomplish with that pose?” Actress: “I’m showing the inner torment of my character.” Director: “When did your character become a pouty mermaid? We don’t even have any water in this film.” Actress: “Isn’t that a picture of the Titanic behind […]

Past Imperfect – #136

Lupe was startled when she learned that the censors objected to her performance in this scene. After all, this was years before that horrid little man, Will Hays, came up with the insipid Production Code that edited anything remotely naughty out of the movies. Interestingly enough, the censors […]

Past Imperfect – #94

Angelina was not in a festive mood. She had only agreed to pose for the up-and-coming photographer due to a whimsical bet that had gone awry at the country club. Then there was that whole mess with some government guy wanting to speak with her about the legal […]

Past Imperfect – #211

Ginger: “Well, I guess there might be some truth to the rumor that California is sliding into the ocean.” Photographer: “It’s just the pills, dear. The room isn’t actually tilting.” Ginger: “The pills? My happy snacks?” Photographer: “Yes, those. Maybe you shouldn’t take so many of them.” Ginger: […]

Past Imperfect – #220

Joan: “Do you think the tree is a bit much?” Alfred: “I’m sorry. I couldn’t hear you over the crackling sounds of the plastic you insist be on these couches.” Joan: “The tree, darling. Is it overdone?” Alfred: “Compared to your acting? No.” Joan: “What could you possibly […]

Past Imperfect – #34

They weren’t sure where they were, how they got there, or who decided to stop at the bordello for a costume change. But they were happy, and that’s all that really mattered. Until some fool decided to question things and bring everybody down. Smyrna, left, fool: “Maybe this […]

Past Imperfect – #128

Casting Call on the set of “Peach Blossom Clambake” – Starlet #1: “I’m going to smile like hell even though I know I’m having a bad hair day. Momma always said that clean, pretty teeth will keep you out of jail.” Starlet #2: “”Eventually I will give birth […]

Past Imperfect – #489

Joy: “Humphrey, tell me the rumor isn’t true!” Humphrey: “I’m afraid it is. This is the smallest table to ever appear in a nightclub. I don’t know how it’s holding up my bottle of hooch. I better drink more before the table collapses.” Joy: “Oh, I’ve already emotionally […]