Tag: Movies

BuMP -#2: Psychotic Birds in a Boat Headed North by Northwest to Catch a Thieving Correspondent Intent on Sabotaging the Stranger on a Train Standing at the Rear Window and Holding a Rope Despite the Vertigo and the Trouble with Harry

[Left to right…] Hume: “I’m not sure what I’m seeing. It’s almost indescribable, like the weird way these clothes make me look twelve years old.” Henry: “Well, I lost my glasses fightin’ off that giant squid a few miles back while the rest of you did squat, but […]

Past Imperfect – #181

William: “What the hell are you doing?” Gloria: “I’m doing what I do best. I’m being overly dramatic about everything in my life.” William: “But doesn’t that just wear you out after a while? I’m already tired and I’m just watching you.” Gloria: “That’s because you’re young. The […]

Past Imperfect – #179

Farley, left: “I can’t stop smiling when I look at you.” Robert, right: “Wait, that line isn’t in the script.” Farley: “Nor is my attraction to you.” Robert: “Really? Well, we just took a turn I wasn’t expecting.” Farley: “Oh, please. You’re the one that ordered the 120-proof […]

Past Imperfect – #176

Clark: “Okay, are you ready to do this scene?” Jean: “I think so. But can I say that you really look a lot hotter here than you will in that Gone with the Wind mess you’ll make in a few years?” Clark: “Of course you can say that. […]

Past Imperfect – #160

Tea Party Handbook – Manly Edition, Section 42, Clause B: “This is the proper position that your wife should assume when you arrive at home after a long day of doing everything you can to ensure that white, conservative, misogynistic men rule the planet. She is not allowed […]

Past Imperfect – #106

Fred was somewhat taken aback that his companion would do such a thing in a grocery store, especially in the dry-goods section, which it no longer was. Barbara didn’t care. When situations arose, you took care of them, and then you moved on. Besides, it would teach that […]

Past Imperfect – #83

As Zelda walked into the Gamma Bamma Slamma sorority house for her interview, she was not at all disturbed by the exuberant smoking, the obvious fact that none of them had a professional stylist, or even the aura of possible lesbianism. She was, however, a bit concerned that […]

Past Imperfect – #427

Kim: “Now, Marlon, let’s not jump to conclusions here.” Marlon: “How can I not jump? I come home from a hard day’s work of looking sexy as hell on the streets of New Orleans and I find this!” Kim: “It’s not what you think.” Marlon: “Well, I think […]

Past Imperfect – #67

Yes, Colleen was dismayed to learn that her beau had fallen under the spell of that harlot from her Garden Club. Luckily, Colleen had recently installed a lovely contraption wherein all she had to do was pull the rope to her left and the home-wrecking vixen would plummet […]

Past Imperfect – #51

Vivien, the Actress, playing a proper British Southerner: “Well, I declare. I am outraged at your suggestion.” Clark, the Actor, playing whatever role brought the best paycheck: “Frankly, my dear, you’re always outraged.” Victor, the Director (well, the director once they canned George Cukor): “Aw, geez, my ulcer […]