Howdy, Clam Bakers. As some of you are surely aware, Bonnywood Manor recently hosted a series of seminars by the esteemed Dr. Brian, an uncertified psychologist renowned for his ability to take a mere bit of happenstance and turn it into a chronic condition requiring years of intensive […]
Years ago, a friend that I only knew on Facebook, but a great friend nonetheless, went through the shock of her brother passing, unexpectedly. In sympathy, I wrote a poem imagining their relationship, a desperate attempt to console. We grew even closer after that. Some time later, she […]
“The only thing that can possibly explain this scene is the now-empty enormous coffee cup in the lower right…” Suddenly, someone stomped into my home office. I cannot name this person because said person is one of those family members who does not care to be mentioned in […]
Once upon a time, as a companion piece to my “Backup Dancers From Hell” blog, I had a side project entitled “Typos From Hell”, wherein I would slightly alter the title of a popular song and then come up with a fake promotional bit for that violated title. […]
Howdy, Clam Bakers. Some of you may have already seen the cryptic tweet from the Home Office indicating that, due to circumstances somewhat beyond our control, the main campfire at Bonnywood Manor has been temporarily shuttered until the local Hazmat Team can attend to the situation. I can’t […]
Howdy, Clam Bakers. Before we get to tonight’s entertainment program, I feel compelled to mention something that surfaced at our last staff meeting during happy hour at Monique’s House of Sushi and Slammers. We have very few regulations here at Camp Bonnywood, and we strongly encourage the healthy […]
This is how one turns to a life of crime and indiscretion: When your older sisters force you to wear ridiculous costumes and then torment you further by laughing uproariously, despite their inability to arrange Grandma Bennett’s heirloom china in a proper table setting. The day will come, […]
Six degrees of snarkeration… Take 1: Some people will do anything to get more likes on Facebook. Take 2: Congress tries once again to pass any kind of respectable legislation this year. Take 3: The revolving door of White House press secretaries tries to put a spin on […]
Howdy, Clam Bakers. Grab a seat around the campfire and settle into your chairs. We’re trying something a little different tonight. Part of the reason for this variance is that I spent too much time today doing things I shouldn’t have (XBOX may have been involved, I’m not […]
1. “I knew there were going to be issues when they told me I had to light both ends of the baton before I could twirl it.” 2. “Does anyone have a really big truck that can haul something the size of a small elephant? Oh, and I […]
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