Alfred was appalled at Tallulah’s suggestion that he didn’t know how to properly direct this scene. Tallulah was appalled that only one rose had been delivered to her dressing room. The script supervisor was appalled that Tallulah thought her outfit was fetching in any way; with markings like […]
Much to her dismay, Irene’s powerful interpretive dance about the mating habits of the Balinese Freckled Stork failed to impress her fellow passengers, and she was shunned later that evening in the First Class Dining Room. Undeterred, because she had been bred with premium-stock Connecticut money, she marched […]
Note: Years ago, when my “Crusty Pie” blog was in its formative months, I was hyper-invested in the goings on, often putting out three posts a day. (Granted, many of them were simple one or two-liners, but still.) At that inane rate of productivity, there were bound to […]
I answered the front door. “Yes?” A man stood there, clipboard in hand and tool belt on waist. “I’m here to fix your water heater.” Hallelujah. I immediately worshipped this man and all he stood for, nearly dropping to my knees and kissing his booted feet for finally […]
Firstly, I feel it is my moral duty to point out that this post is not about any of the salacious imagery some of you may have imagined upon reading the title. Normally, I wouldn’t feel compelled to make this disclaimer (after all, I am the most chaste […]
Note: In the commentary for my Redneck Valentines post, “someone” asked about cards and stories for folks who are NOT in a relationship on Valentine’s Day. Well, I just so happened to have this in the archives… Jeanne: “Hello, Tree. I’m here once again, sharing my thoughts, […]
Note: Two things. We’re approaching the dead of winter here, so a nice “summer” post was calling my name. And since my last post concerning a certain niece proved rather successful, I thought I should dip into that well again. Enjoy. So as the last few minutes […]
Editor’s Note: Many thanks to the fine folks who suggested phrases for this second edition… 1. “Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!” Translation: “I am completely stunned by this unexpected turn in our conversation. And since I didn’t have an adequate response I decided […]
1. “Well, sugar my foot!” Translation: “I am thoroughly astonished that what you just said is actually true. Even if it’s really not.” This is a response often heard during whispered gossip sessions at the local Baptist church. 2. “That thing just flopped back yonder.” Translation: “The item […]
Note: I stumbled across this older post whilst looking for something else, and I thought it might be fitting for a chilly December night. This is merely a comment that I made on a nostalgic piece that Margo shared on “That Little Voice”, so there’s no real structure, […]
Recent Comments