Several years ago, as I was naively living what I thought was a rather satisfactory life, a dear friend pulled me to the side, handed me a margarita, waited for me to finish it (which took 3 seconds, because I have skills), and then said: “Everything you are […]
Note: This is the “Pinterest” version, but the shocking obsessions and degradations essentially apply to all platforms. More to follow. 1. You no longer remember the names of your children. Or if you even have any. 2. The last time you looked at the television, “Friends” was still […]
Howdy, Clam Bakers. After the excitement of last week’s bake (guest speakers! Elderberry wine! Salami-grasping!), tonight’s campfire will be more subdued. I was in the midst of some digital housekeeping this afternoon, trying to figure out what’s in all these cryptically-christened files that are apparently breeding on my […]
1. “How to Remove Your Head from Your Ass Using Common Household Items” 2. “The Margarita-Based Diet” 3. “He’s So Completely Not into You That He’s Moving to Another Planet” 4. “Chicken Soup for the Soulless” 5. “The Five Best Ways to Keep People from Slapping You” 6. […]
1. “I knew there were going to be issues when they told me I had to light both ends of the baton before I could twirl it.” 2. “Does anyone have a really big truck that can haul something the size of a small elephant? Oh, and I […]
Dearest Neighbor, How are you this fine morning? I trust that you realize it is morning. Quite early in the morning, as a matter of fact. Were you aware of this? Perhaps not. Maybe you’re one of those people who leap out of bed without any concept of […]
I first got to know Claudette in a visual manner, so to speak, through the lovely photography on her site. Her images and vistas ranged from tiny to expansive, and she would fiddle with angles and textures and perspectives, sometimes using filters and post-production techniques to lead us […]
1. Thank you for choosing to fly with us today. 2. You know, it’s proper etiquette that you knock before you just barge in here. 3. What are your thoughts on public nudity? 4. Did you know that serial killers really like to push buttons that light up? […]
1. The parking lot. The uncontrolled behavior starts before I even get in the store. I’m one of those who doesn’t like to park anywhere near the entrances to a retail establishment, because some drivers are incredibly stupid and inconsiderate and I don’t want them maneuvering a vehicle […]
Howdy, folks. Just a quick note that NaNoWriMo is going well, meeting my daily quota and whatnot. (Of course, I have probably just jinxed myself by saying that and I will spend the next several days in a catatonic state, staring at my laptop, both my mind and […]
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