Karen, left: “Doesn’t this make you feel pretty and special?” Archie, right: “Those aren’t quite the two words I would use. Can you explain to me again why we’re wearing these things on our faces?” Karen: “Silly, I already told you. Noses are no longer fashionable.” Archie: “How […]
The First Rule in Attracting a Decent Mate: Do not appear in settings where the wallpaper can overpower your mere existence. They have enough trouble finding you as it is. Harriet, left: “You fool, you went two steps too far before pausing to be noticed by the crowd. […]
To fully enjoy this post, you really should review the previous one, if you haven’t already… I heard the Air-Conditioning Tech Guy begin descending the attic stair-ladder deathtrap. I peeked out of the home office where I had been pretending to be busy doing whatever, in that weird […]
Today was not the best of days. The proceedings began when I was wrenched awake at the ungodly hour of 8am. Naturally, some of you will scoff at this timestamp, having already been awake for hours and having helped raise a barn in Amish country before breakfast. (You […]
Note: I’ve missed the anniversary date by a few days, but five years ago, late on the night before an anticipated ruling by the Supreme Court that could potentially change the concept of equality in America, I scribbled out this little parable, with fingers crossed… Mommy: “The end. […]
1. You whack at the alarm clock, fully intending to get another 10 minutes of sleep, and the snooze bar snaps off said clock and flops under the bed. And now the alarm won’t stop bleating, negating any short-term escape from the trials of the impending day. The […]
I understand that some of our fellow travelers don’t quite grasp the instructional signage they may encounter whilst driving to their therapist. Let me help you out with that. 1. YIELD This means that you are not the priority in this situation. Other people temporarily have more authority, […]
Hey, Folks. This week’s writing prompt will be short and sweet, mainly because some of you are still wondering “what the hell was that blue thing you posted for last week’s challenge?” I’ll get to that in a moment, promise, but we first need to address the fresh […]
Note: This is another humorous post from the archives that, upon review, causes me to channel Neil Diamond and think “well, except for the names and a few other changes… the story’s the same one”. You’ll have to excuse the dated references, but the truth is still worth […]
Note: It’s been four years since the massacre at the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, Florida. With all the upheaval that has been going on lately, this dark anniversary has somewhat slipped under the cultural radar. The people who died on that horrible night should not be forgotten, so […]
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