Bjorn, left: “Well, I hear that those wretched Americans are coming down out of the hills of Cómpeta and headed to Malaga.” Torvik, right: “Those words make me weep with inconsolable abandon. Why must they torture us so?” Bjorn: “Now, now. We have to give the poor things […]
2000 B.C. – 999 A.D.: The Native Americans live peaceably for thousands of years. Sure, a few of the tribes were a bit violent, but this pales in comparison to the religious persecutions that were all the rage in the Old World. (“I have the religious right to […]
Howdy, folks. How y’all doin’? Good to hear. Listen, me and the mister finally made our way out of the high-ass elevation of Pecos, New Mexico and down to the flat-ass no elevation of Dallas, Texas, rumbling into Bonnywood Manor all dusty and cranky. (Ain’t nuthin’ gonna test […]
For the Vanderbilts, this was merely the servants’ quarters… Note: This is part of an on-going experiment at Bonnywood. Details found here. P.S. And yes, I realize that some of these ancient, never-updated Past Imperfects are less than stellar when it comes to imagination and wit. This is […]
Somebody on the selection committee at the Atlantic City Miss America pageant was a wee bit confused about the actual states in America… Note: This is part of an on-going experiment at Bonnywood. Details found here. P.S. Yes, I realize that, over the years, the pageant had candidates […]
Innocent Bystander #1: “Are you seeing what I’m seeing?” Innocent Bystander #2: “If you mean a giant Donald Duck ass-up in the street, yes.” IB #1: “Does this happen a lot around here?” IB #2: “It’s New York City. You don’t question anything. You just hope that whatever […]
Mardi Gras in the French Quarter of New Orleans, the morning after. Some would call it “Ash Wednesday”, but there was no one awake to make that call. (The two people you can see don’t count. They have been wandering the streets all night in search of their […]
This is what people were required to wear at a public beach in 1900. Suddenly, your life doesn’t seem so bad, eh? Note: This is part of a whimsical on-going experiment at Bonnywood. Details found here.
Hey there, Happy Campers, It’s that time of year again. In a few days, we’ll be hightailing it to the mountains of Santa Fe, attending another lark at Hidden Valley Ranch, a lovely vacation compound crammed with delightful accommodations, beautiful scenery and the occasional untimely demise of one […]
1. “The wi-fi really sucks in here.” 2. “I didn’t realize you were THAT invested in getting my Adele tickets.” 3. “Guess I didn’t need to save those vacation days after all.” 4. “Well, at least I won’t have to put up with any more psycho-drama at Thanksgiving […]
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